Hilarious Warriors Scenes
by xxdeletexx
Summary: These are just some funny, short Warriors scenes that I made. Enjoy!
1. Bluestar, Spottedleaf and Firestar

**Warning. Do not read. This is just a test to see if I can delete documents without actually deleting the ones in the stories.**

Once upon a time, fjksef dsjfds fdsf afjserhiusaef dfnd fndsj vcndjfaskdjfskdghuirjsnfjgueyfn fhdusonfjh mfhfget fjdfheud sjh sufhsdnfusehfdiaoue hff fjdfndjfhry hf!

**_THE END!_**

Once upon a time, there was a cat. His name was Firestar.

Firestar loved both Sandstorm and Spottedleaf, and he didn't know which one to choose.

So, one day, he went up to StarClan and asked to see Spottedleaf.

"Spottedleaf? Sure, Firestar. She's in her room, but on her phone." Bluestar meowed, sliding her glasses down to the bridge of her nose.

"What room?" Firestar queried.

"Room ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." Bluestar answered, a look of pure seriousness glinting in her misty blue eyes.

"OK, thanks." Firestar mewed, padding away to Spottedleaf's room.

Firestar banged his head against her door all night long, as Spotted leaf never answered. He had had to go up 10000000000000000000000 flights of stairs, and he was dead-tired but kept on banging anyway.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you." Bluestar mewed, padding up to him.

"What is it?" Firestar grumbled.

"Spottedleaf moved to room ABC last night." Bluestar meowed, her glasses gleaming.

"What?!" Hissed Firestar, miffed and furious.

"Now I have to go down 100000000000000000000 flights of stairs! AGAIN!"

He started breathing in heavy, quick and angry breaths.

"Now, now, Firestar." Bluestar mewed soothingly.

"You need to stay calm."

"Calm!? I'M COMPLETELY CALM!" Firestar yowled to her, lunging at his former leader and killing her, rage taunting him.

Firestar felt satisfaction building up inside him.

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAAAHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" He caterwauled crazily.

"I shall take over StarClan! MWAHAHAHA! Beware! Beware! I am your leader now!"

He went over to the loudspeaker and spoke into it.

"Attention, all StarClan cats!" He yowled into it, his tone slightly neurotic.

"This is Firestar, surrender or die! I am your leader now!"

"Firestar? How-how _could _you?" Spottedleaf hissed from behind him.

"I...uh...um..." Firestar began, his first true love snapping him back to sanity.

"Hmph!" Spottedleaf huffed, slapping Firestar with her purse.

Then she walked away from him, her tail high up in the air.


	2. The Terrible Kin

Once upon a time in a land far, far away, there was a beautiful she-cat. Her name was Dovewing.

One day, Dovewing was texting her boyfriend, Tigerheart.

_Tigerheart- love u_

_Dovewing- want 2 get married?_

_Tigerheart- we r 2 young wait a few more moons_

_Dovewing- o k_

_Tigerheart- bye sweetie_

Then, Bumblestripe came up to Dovewing, and started scratching her.

"DOVEWING YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE _MY _MATE!" He screeched furiously.

Dovewing just glared at him, then padded away to see Bramblestar.

"Right there?" Squirrelflight asked.

"Yes! That feels so good!" Bramblestar meowed.

Dovewing raced into the leader's den with a look of sheer horror on her face.

The couple were sharing tongues, and Squirrelflight's tongue rasped over her leader's ear.

"Well, that got rid of that itch!" Mewed Bramblestar, standing up to stretch.

He plopped down on his lava-red beanbag, turning on the TV. A show about kits being princesses in cartoon forms came on.

"Oh, no!" Said a dark cream she-kit with a pink tiara.

"We have to stop the evil Tigerstar from capturing the unicorn cat!"

Then, she padded over to a cat that looked similar to Tigerstar.

"AHHHHH! IT'S MY WORST NIGHTMARE! TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!" Bramblestar screamed, thrashing his limbs.

Squirrelflight switched it on to a channel about kits playing in a river.

"Look, Waterkit! It's a brown tabby tom's head floating in the river!" Squealed a light gray tom-kit.

Suddenly, the head burst up, and a cartoon character that looked like Hawkfrost emerged.

"MWAHAHA! MWAHAHA!" Screeched the Hawkfrost thing.

"Die little kits, DIE!"

"No! It's Hawkfrost! I SAID TURN IT OFF, SQUIRRELFLIGHT!" Bramblestar sobbed.

Squirrelflight turned the TV off.

Then, Bramblestar was so utterly horrified and scared, that he exploded. That caused Squirrelflight to faint and then that caused Dovewing to run away, only to fall into a pool of bubbling lava and die.

Then, Blossomfall emerged from her room, texting on her phone and talking on her other phone.

Then Briarlight dragged herself to the scene and laughed until her head shot up into the air and exploded, creating fireworks.

Then Millie screamed her dead daughter's name and then her face caved in, and Graystripe threw confetti on her and all the cats had a Yay Millie is Dead party. Then Silverstream came down and lit Millie on fire. Millie's ghost came out of her body and picked up Leafpool, dropping her from 10100101010 miles in the air. Leafpool landed on the ground and blood splattered everywhere.

Feathertail came from the Tribe of Endless Hunting's party and started break-dancing until she spun on her head so hard it flew right off.

Then, Crowfeather came and started eating her and Leafpool.

Bluestar came and froze time while Oakheart kissed her on the cheek and they started making out.

**Q: On a scale of one to ten, how funny was this?**


	3. Let It Go

"Everybody dance now!" Yowled Leafpool.

It was a, Yay We Won The Battle With The Dark Forest party.

Flashing rainbow lights danced around the Gathering Island where all the Clans, including StarClan, were gathered for a party.

Then, Tigerstar came down and started break-dancing.

"Tigerstar! Tigerstar!" Screeched all the she-cats, mooning over the tom.

"I'm a little tea-pot, short and stout!" Hawkfrost sang, while every cat covered their ears at his terrible singing.

Redstar turned the volume up on the music. The song was, 'Let it go,' from Frozen. The music was so loud his ears blew off and he died. Owlstar started crying so hard he drowned in his own tears.

Leafpool began gorging herself on candy so much she started running super fast. Then she turned into a cheetah and all her spots came off and started doing ballet.

"More candy!" Screamed Leafpool.

"OK, have fun with the diabetes." Crowfeather meowed, tossing her 20000000 bars of chocolate.

All the StarClan cats were doing the cha-cha-line (or the tanga-line) (or whatever it's called) while walking on a rainbow path.

Whitestorm was getting so much into the dance that when he kicked out his left paw he accidentally kicked Daisy in the face.

Daisy hissed at him while drinking red wine and getting drunk.

Firestar and Bramblestar were drinking beer while their arms were across each others' shoulders. They were singing old Irish songs while Willowshine played her bagpipe.

"Let it go, let it go!" Mothwing sang to the song that was playing.

Then Darkstripe placed a bomb under Sandstorm's butt. When Sandstorm farted, it lit the bomb.

"Earth-destruct sequence starting in five seconds." Said the bomb.

Then it exploded, and everyone died and lived happily ever after.


	4. Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing on Rainbows

The nursery. A place where kits and queens are safe.

"I wanna watch Tigerstar's Revenge on the Evil Clan Cats Channel!" Lilykit demanded with huge, dark blue pleading eyes to her mother, Sorreltail.

"Ugh, fine." Sighed Sorreltail, switching the TV on.

"Today, ThunderClan has launched an attack on WindClan, accusing them of stealing prey. Plus more, on, Dark Forest News." Meowed Hawkfrost, smiling.

"Ooh! I'm going to watch the news, Seedkit and Lilykit." Sorreltail mewed.

"Aw!" Lilykit and Seedkit mewled in disappointment.

"Sorreltail! The meeting for the book club is starting!" Brackenfur meowed, racing into the nursery.

Sorreltail was so intent on watching the news, that she turned into a zombie.

"Brains..." she groaned, eating every Clan cat's brains.

Pretty soon, StarClan came down and started doing the can-can, while kicking the zombie cats in the face and laughing, at the same time getting drunk on red wine.

Mothwing, the only cat that wasn't a zombie, grew moth wings and began flying all over the place, only to crash into a tree and die. She soon joined the StarClan cats in their dance, as she now believed.

All the Clan cats were healed! YAYAYAYYAYAY!

Then Squirrelflight turned into a flying squirrel, making cats explode.

Cloudtail was one of those unfortunate victims of Squirrelflight. His head exploded and he was deleted from all the warrior cats fanfictions, plus the original series. He was basically erased from time.

Then, Leafpool became leaves floating in a pool, while Spiderleg grew spider legs, and started walking on the walls of all the dens.

"Spiderleg, Spiderleg! Does whatever a spider can! Spins a web, and he cries! Catches prey just like flies! Look out! Here comes the Spiderleg!" Spiderleg sang to the tune of the Spiderman theme song thingy.

Then, the whole world exploded, making a pretty rainbow. A pink, fluffy unicorn came and started dancing on the rainbow, and pretty soon Tigerstar, Hawkfrost and Brokenstar joined it, and started singing the My Little Pony Friendship is Magic theme song.

Then, the rainbow exploded, making a pretty pony transform into Bluestar, who winked at all the people who are reading this.

She walked on Jupiter, then fell into it and died a second time.

And all the kitties lived happily ever after!

**THE END!**


	5. RAINBOOOOOOWZZZZ

There was once a little she-cat who loved to read. She loved Brightheart Fanfictions, because they were about Brightheart. But she didn't like Brightheart. She only liked it when she died. The little she-cat's name is Daisy. And she loves Cloudtail. Clouddaisy! DAISYTAIL!

"RAINBOOOOOOWZZZZZZZZZ!" yowled Daisy as she threw RAINBOOOOOOW confetti into the AIIIIR!

"The humor is gone from the world," muttered Ferncloud darkly, curling her tail around her nose.

"You diiiiiiiied..." Daisy meowed.

"But I'm alive," Ferncloud pointed out.

"It is morniiiing..." Brightheart mewed.

"I don't like youuuuu..." whispered Daisy.

"Quick!" hissed Bramblestar as he burst into the den. "I think we've found the robot in ThunderClan!"

All the queens and their kits burst out of the den, facing a line of cats.

Bramblestar nodded to Cloudtail.

"Speak," he ordered. "What is your name?"

"Cloudtail."

"What is your name?"

"Sorreltail."

"What is your name?"

"Brackenfur."

"What is your name?"

"Input name, Squirrelflight."

"What is your name?"

"I'm a gypsy," meowed Cherrypaw.

"What is your name?"

"I'm American," mewed Applefur. "Buy some apples!"

"Buy yourself!" Tigerstar jeered.

"I will destroy you, and steal your fiance!" taunted Applefur, shaking her bottom at Tigerstar. "Booty, booty, booty, booty rockin' everywhere!"

"I have a fiance?" Tigerstar echoed.

"I'm carrying your kits!" Applefur cheered.

"I don't know you anymore," Tigerstar mewed quickly.

"But you know my name!" Applefur teased.

"Cloudtail, I think it's time you took a bath!" Brightheart snapped to her mate.

"Ugh! But the water makes me feel funny!" Cloudtail complained, but padded over to a puddle anyway, getting in. Electric sparks burst off of him, then he burst into flames.

"Initiating cry sequence," Cloudtail fizzed.

He died. YAYAYAYAY!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" caterwauled Daisy, but then, she too, exploded.

Leafpool then stared at Crowfeather, not moving.

"She's scaring me, mommy!" Crowfeather wailed to Ashfoot.

Two seconds after Crowfeather looked away, Leafpool was up in his face. Literally.

"Mommy, she feels funny in my nose!" Crowfeather complained, sniffing several times.

"Then blow her out," Ashfoot told him.

Crowfeather got a tissue and blew his nose as a green Leafpool came flying out.

"Why do his nostrils whisper to me?" she queried in a high-pitched voice, as she was very tiny. Then she grew back to normal size, still covered in snot.

"She'll never stop growing," Bramblestar warned as Leafpool grew and grew until she was the size of the entire Earth.

"I can see my den from here!" Leafpool yowled in a deep voice.

Then she shrunk back down to her normal size, seeing all the cats and dens in which she'd squished.

"Bye-bye..." she whispered as she shrunk down to being so small that she could she into... the FABRIC OF TIME!

"I'll go back in time and save Hollyleaf!" she thought.

"NEVER!" said a human voice as a young woman with platinum-blonde hair and a frosty-blue, thin gown appeared.

"My name is Elsa..." said the girl. "And this is my sister, Anna!"

A red-haired girl with a... with a dress stepped out of the shadows.

"What kind of names are those?" hissed Leafpool.

"EVERYTHING..." whispered Anna eerily.

"Can I go home now?" Leafpool cringed.

"Back in time before you went up Crowfeather's nose and killed every cat!" Elsa demanded, and Leafpool went back in time.

"Who are you?" sniffed a kit with a crooked jaw. "I'm Crookedkit..."

**TO BE CONTINUED! (Not really)  
>By RAINBOOOOOOWZZZZZZZZZ Burrfrost!<strong>

**I am now accepting submissions for ideas on what kind of humor short stories I should do next!**


	6. The Strangest of them All

Chapter whateverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr: Mary-sue time!

"It's a beautiful day!" cheered Lionblaze as he WALKED out of camp.

"Ohhhhh..." moaned a voice.

"WHAT IS GOING ON?!" raged Lionblaze, though he didn't see anything yet.

"Jayfeather..." the feminine voice panted.

Lionblaze's face began to get all droopy with disbelief. Literally.

"MY FACE IS MELTING!" he screamed, walking in on Jayfeather and Briarlight. Jayfeather was on top of the she-cat, but Lionblaze's eyes were too covered in goop to see anything else.

"ARE YOU KISSING?" he roared, his face sucking back up to normal. Jayfeather and Briarlight were sitting side-by-side guiltily.

"Maybe..." murmured Jayfeather.

Lionblaze... FARTED OUT glitter... then he... EXPLODED!

"oh my gosh lionblaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaze" mewed Jayfeather like a Mary-Sue.

There was a long moment of silence.

"I'm gonna eat you," teased Briarlight.

"It feels good when you do that," Jayfeather commented. "You're so good at it!"

"Not that way," said Briarlight, scrunching up her face. Not literally, but, you know what I mean. WINNING'S- forget it. Anyway, Briarlight ate Jayfeather and licked her lips afterward.

"nummy nummy mummy tastes like Millie," she meowed.

"It's MY little pony!" RAGED TIGGERSTRAW I MEAN TIGERSTAR!

(mary-sue time!)

Biarlite liked pee so she ate Tigerstar cuz he tasted like it.

"Mmm... pie..." she sad and then thru up Jayfreather and Tigggggggggerstar.

"hey baby" said Briarlite but she axeidentally was talking 2... TIGRESTAR!  
>(exit mary-sue time)<p>

Tigerstar got the wrong idea and started kissing Briarlight.

"You are the most disg-" she began, pulling away, but was interrupted by Hawkfrost.

"I sang a song about a portal once," he commented. "Wanna hear it?"

"I'm good," muttered Briarlight.

"WATCH AS I WORK MY GYPSY MAGIC EYE OF LEAFPOOL AND BURDOCK ROOT! WATCH AS THE MATTER TURNS TO-"

"ENOUGH!" hollered Briarlight, stopping Hawkfrost from singing his off-key song. "I WANT THE MUFFIN!"

Suddenly a muffin appeared.

"But I like muffins..." whimpered Hawkfrost. He then turned angry and gobbled the muffin up.

Briarlight gasped. "If I can't eat the muffin-" she yowled. "NO ONE CAN!" And with that, she gobbled up Hawkfrost, taking the muffin in his stomach with her.

Tigerstar and Jayfeather screamed like little she-kits and ran away, wailing for their mommies.

"LEOPARDFOOT!" screamed Tigerstar.

"LEAFPOOL!" screeched Jayfeather.

Then they began wailing for their siblings.

"NIGHTKIT AND MISTKIT!" wailed Tigerstar, crying.

"HOLLYLEAF AND LIONBLAZE!" caterwauled Jayfeather, sobbing.

Hawkfrost was dead! So Ivypool cried.

"Wait, where'd you come from, Ivypoo?" said Hawkfrost.

"How'd you escape?" hissed Briarlight. "AND WHERE'S MAH MUFFIN?!"

"Don't ever call my Ivypoo' again," Ivypool hissed.

"IN MAH BELLY!" jeered Hawkfrost.

Briarlight exploded into a happy, happy rainbow and ate every single cat in the Clans. The tastiest was Crookedstar in StarClan!

Burrfrost looked onto her computer screen at what she was typing.

_I've gone completely nuts... _she thought before exploding into laughter.

"Should I make more?" she then asked the audience. "Or has this gotten WAY out of paw?"


End file.
